In the present day, there is constant discussion about Disney's impact on millennials, particularly in setting unrealistic expectations regarding love relationships. Many romantic comedies feature problematic couples that ultimately end up together. Both Disney and romantic comedies often take advantage of our naïve and optimistic views on love, twisting them into something irrational. The consequences of this impact are undeniable. Additionally, they perpetuate gender roles and limit diversity with a focus on white heteronormative relationships, and in some cases, they even promote female competitiveness.
It is relevant to mention that romcoms are advantageous from a production perspective. They are quicker and cheaper to make, often requiring little or no special effects and involving simple logistics. Additionally, they offer good opportunities for actors. They are a beloved and hated genre for the audience.
Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs (many directors, 1937) and Sleeping Beauty (many directors, 1959) depict the 'true love kiss' as a non-consensual act, with both princesses ultimately finding their 'happily ever after' with their abusers. It's worth mentioning that these stories were inspired by darker fairy tales that involved rape. This issue extends to more modern tales as well, as seen in Beauty and The Beast (Gary Trousdale and Kirk Wise, 1991). In this narrative, a woman endures horrifically abusive behaviour from someone, creating a power and control dynamic. She doesn't leave the situation but instead accepts it, and the story concludes with a 'happily ever after.' This animation even popularized a psychological concept coined after this problematic theme.
In 'Sixteen Candles' (John Hughes, 1984), Jake Ryan (Michael Schoeffling) assists in a troubling scene involving sexual assault with Caroline Mulford (Haviland Morris). Despite his involvement, Jake's character is still upheld as the charming and sweet love interest for Samantha Baker (Molly Ringwald).
In 'The Breakfast Club' (John Hughes, 1985), there is a troubling scene where John Bender (Judd Nelson) goes under the table where Claire Standish (Molly Ringwald) is sitting, peeks under her skirt, and behaves inappropriately. Despite this incident, the characters end up together.
In 'Overboard' (Garry Marshall, 1987), Dean Proffit (Kurt Russell) takes advantage of Joana Stayton (Goldie Hawn), a woman with amnesia, by deceiving her into believing they are married. This plot device is repeated in several other films, including '50 First Dates' (Peter Segal, 2004), 'While You Were Sleeping' (Jon Turteltaub, 1995), and 'Holiday in Handcuffs' (Ron Underwood, 2007).
Clueless (Amy Heckerling, 1995) Josh (Paul Rudd) has a college student hitting on a teenager, Cher (Alicia Silverstone) who is also his stepsister.
In 'Miss Congeniality' (Donald Petrie, 2000), the character Eric only acknowledges Gracie's existence after her makeover. This theme of transformation is also present in films like 'She's All That' (Robert Iscove, 1999), 'Cinderella' and 'Pretty Woman' (Garry Marshall, 1990).
In 'Shallow Hal' (Peter & Bobby Farrelly, 2001), the character Hal (Jack Black) initially rejects Rosemary Shanahan (Gwyneth Paltrow) upon discovering her actual weight, but she ultimately ends up with him. This plot theme is also present in 'A Walk to Remember' (Adam Shankman, 2002), where Jamie Sullivan (Mandy Moore) faces constant bullying by Landon Carter (Shane West) but ultimately ends up with him. 'Pretty in Pink' (Howard Deutch, 1986) served as a precursor to these, as Andie (Molly Ringwald) chooses Blane McDonald (Andrew McCarthy), who consistently humiliates and demeans her, over the sweet nerdy Duckie Dale (Jon Cryer). A similar theme is seen in 'Cocktail' (Ronald Donaldson, 1988).
In 'The Devil Wears Prada' (David Frankel, 2006), the character Andy's boyfriend feels threatened by her success and attempts to undermine her. This theme bears similarity to 'What Women Want' (Nancy Meyers, 2000), where the protagonist sabotages his female boss.
In 'The Switch' (Josh Gordon and Will Speck, 2010), Wally (Jason Bateman), the best friend of Kassie (Jennifer Aniston), decides to have a baby via a sperm donor. During her pregnancy party, he becomes extremely intoxicated and accidentally spills the sperm sample she's planning to use down the drain. In a moment of impulse, he replaces the sample with his own without her knowledge.
In 'Fifty Shades of Grey' (Sam Taylor-Johnson, 2015), the character Christian Grey (Jamie Dornan) coerces Anastasia Steele (Dakota Johnson) into signing a contract that essentially makes it difficult for her to refuse his sexual advances, creating a power and control dynamic. It's worth noting that this story originated as fanfiction of another problematic work, the 'Twilight' saga, which itself depicts themes of psychological and emotional abuse.
However, there hasn't been enough discussion about successful contemporary love stories on screen that target a young audience and still romanticize toxicity.
This is worrisome as what they watch on screens can easily influence them. Several issues arise, including misconceptions about love, the influence on their choices in relationships, the normalization of harmful behaviour, lower self-esteem, and impacts on mental health. Additionally, it can be challenging for them to identify red flags, and gender stereotypes can be perpetuated. Consequently, these factors contribute to a cycle with a lasting impact on future relationships and their overall future, which will be in their hands.
Arguably, this phenomenon gained renewed attention with 'After' (Jenny Gage, 2019), which is an adaptation from a Wattpad fanfiction based on the British boyband One Direction. The story revolves around an emotionally unhealthy relationship between Tessa (Josephine Langford), often portrayed as a 'virgin Mary,' and Hardin (Hero Fiennes Tiffin), the 'bad boy.' While they are visually depicted as opposites, they share a connection through their bookish interests. However, Hardin's behaviour is marked by toxicity and abuse, characterized by extreme jealousy, aggressiveness, double standards, and manipulation to make Tessa feel sorry for him. Additionally, a bet among Hardin's friends aims to bring her into the bedroom, a plot element similar to 'How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days' (Donald Petrie, 2003) and '10 Things I Hate About You' (Gil Junger, 1999). Hardin's manipulation in 'After' bears resemblance to the character Jerry Maguire (played by Tom Cruise) in 'Jerry Maguire' (Cameron Crowe, 1995). The titular protagonist struggles to handle his own intimacy issues and consistently disrespects Dorothy Boyd (Renée Zellweger), leading her to blame herself.
In 'Sierra Burgess is a Loser' (Ian Samuels, 2018), Sierra Burgess (Shannon Purser) deceives Jamey (Noah Centineo) about her true identity. This plot has been seen before in various stories, such as 'Cinderella' (directed by many directors, 1950), 'Crazy Rich Asians' (Jon M. Chu, 2018), and 'Never Been Kissed' (Raja Gosnell, 1999).
In 'Through My Window' (Marçal Forès, 2022), the story revolves around two neighbours, Raquel (Clara Galle) and Ares Hidalgo (Julio Peña). Raquel is portrayed as an obsessive stalker, while Ares Hidalgo embodies the archetype of a toxic male lead character.
In 'Culpa Mia' (directed by Domingo González, 2023), the film is another adaptation from a Wattpad story and offers a modern take on the 'Romeo and Juliet' theme, with two step-siblings, Noah (Nicole Wallace) and Nick (Gabriel Guevara). What makes this even more problematic is the recent arrest of the film's main male protagonist at the Venice Film Festival on charges of sexual harassment. The story follows the traditional trope from adversaries to lovers, featuring an addict-rich delinquent with a soft heart and a humble damsel in distress, both passionately interested in cars. It's worth highlighting that Nick's character is rooted in toxic masculinity principles.
Many other examples exist that were not mentioned, but the romanticization of toxic relationships in media has influenced a generation that often strays from traditional depictions of romantic love. This has led to issues such as poor communication and fear of commitment. It is our responsibility as a society to acknowledge these challenges and take proactive steps to address them.
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